The Click In Your Head

My gloves dyed my fingers black. That was probably going to be a small forgotten detail about the day I finally convinced myself I could plummet down a mountain on a snowboard instead of my trusty black atomics. What else... what else could I forget... the too too young instructor that reminded me that I might be able to stand in front of someone someday and share the things I know too... learning the rules goofy and then finding halfway down the hill that I was a regular gal after all... being tumbled hard and hearing myself whoop in the midst of it all. The resolute click in your head when you can finally leap from the fear of the unknown into the substance and specificity of real life.

I'm pinning that click here. "Click". See. Right there. I need to remember that click. Hmmm... what else from the past few days?

I made it back to the 6 mile run last night. "Click"
The nighttime ferry ride. "Click"
The moonlit field of orange sea pens & the orgy of onchidoris bilamellata on Vashon. "Click"
Finishing Home & learning again how well Marilynne Robinson can pierce my soul. "Click"
Finding myself cast as a minor role in Les Parapluies de Cherbourg again and watching the twisting kaleidoscope of meaning change around the end stop of forever. "Click"
Eating strawberries in winter. "Click"
Living in and around the lyrics "the silence of a falling star lights up a purple sky"... "Click"
Reading Bukowski in French and really seeing the verb tenses for the first time. "Click"
Finding myself - finally - learning the fingerings on the last page of the Nyman tune. "Click"